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"WILL A RAPE VICTIM EVER FEEL SAFE?"

Question:"I am a victim of rape and incest. I've tried everything to open my heart so I can attract my true love. Do I have a soulmate in this lifetime? If so, why am I not able to attract him?"

Psychic Advice:
Unfortunately, rape and incest are so prevalent in our society that most people, whether they realize it or not, probably know someone who has been victimized at some time. Being a victim of rape and/or incest is a massive violation of trust and boundaries, therefore building trust in personal relationships takes time.

Healing after incest or rape is not easy, but there are several steps you can take to reclaim your sense of power and security, which will allow you to attract and enjoy healthy love relationships in your life. Rape and incest are rarely about sex or sexuality, but are more about power and dominance. The perpetrator seeks to feel powerful by overpowering another, and taking their power from them. This is why victims often feel a tremendous sense of fear and powerlessness for years afterwards.

The first step to healing after incest or rape is to recognize and accept that you are not to blame for what happened to you, no matter what the circumstances. There was nothing you could have done differently, or else you would have, so you must accept that what happened could not have been avoided, for whatever reason. You must also realize that any shame or guilt you have carried since then does not belong to you - it belongs to the perpetrator.

You must forgive yourself by reclaiming your innocence, so allow yourself to remove the heavy cloak of guilt, shame and pain that you have been carrying. Imagine yourself standing naked in the Light of Love, being absolutely loved and accepted unconditionally by All That Is Divine. Accept that your body is your own, that it belongs to you and to no one else, and that your body has done nothing wrong. Let yourself wrap your arms around yourself and give yourself and your body love and acceptance.

Remember that your love and sexuality are your gifts that you offer to share with another - they cannot be taken from you. There is nothing wrong, bad or dirty about your sexuality, it is a divine gift that is designed to be enjoyed. Once you reclaim your body as your own, then you will have the power to share it in love and partnership. 

When one is attacked and traumatized, particularly in childhood, the psyche does whatever is necessary in order to protect itself. Memories get compartmentalized or buried, or one can disassociate from the body and retreat into the mind, leaving the body numb. Under these circumstances, the inner masculine often takes over, armoring the heart and preparing to do battle with anyone because it trusts no one. This armored self faces the world, protecting the wounded, tender, sensitive self at all costs.

The problem that you have in attracting and meeting your soul mate is that any man who meets you encounters your armored masculine self who is determined to protect you from pain. Because people you loved and trusted caused you pain, this protective part of yourself wants to protect you from pain, and equates that with protecting you from love.

What makes this worse is that such breaches of trust as rape and incest cause one to question one's own guidance and intuition, which impedes one from trusting oneself. Your heart and your feelings are key components of your intuitive guidance system, and when they are cut off, walled up, armored or denied, then you have no way of knowing how you feel about anything, so you have no way of knowing who or what you can trust. The key is to learn to trust yourself again.

The first thing you must do is reclaim your power and sovereignty over yourself in the present moment. You do this by stating out loud today's date, your present name and age, and affirm that you have survived intact and that you are now safe. Thank your masculine self for having protected you well up until now, and tell him that you now wish him to join with your feminine self so they can work together to protect you even better.

Visualize your inner masculine self reaching out to your inner feminine self, and see them holding hands within you. Visualize your inner feminine self fully empowered, and allowing your inner masculine self to hold her and embrace her comfortably with love and protection. Give your feminine self permission to receive intuitive guidance and to communicate her feelings clearly to you about all people, places and things. Instruct her to inform you gently and clearly ahead of time if there is a situation that you should not trust. You can even ask for some type of signal, such as your thumb itching or something like that, to alert you that you must pay attention. Once you develop this kind of trust with yourself, you will be able to know who and what you can trust.

In order for your heart to open to attract your true love, it must feel safe. Imagine that there is a rainbow of colored bubbles of light that completely surround your heart. Each of these bubbles is a layer of protection for your heart. Allow yourself to know that this light is much more powerful and protective than any armor, especially because it allows you to feel and thereby to know what is true for you. Walls and armor do not let anything in or out, and do not allow you to feel. They protect you from pain, but they also protect you from love. Be willing to remove your walls and armor around your heart, knowing that it is now protected by a rainbow of divine light.

Now see that there is a rainbow of bubbles of light that completely surround your body, and that each colored light is a layer of your boundaries of protection, with white light surrounding them all. See yourself glowing in this Light of Love, completely surrounded and protected by this light. Let your light shine, and let it attract to you your soul mate who is vibrating at the same frequency of love and light. Know and trust that whenever you surround yourself in this light, you are safe and protected by the entire Universe. Release the identity of being a victim - that is in your past and it served a purpose, but it is not who you are now. You are a divine being of love and light. Light attracts light, and will draw true love to you. And so it is.



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