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HOW TO
END PROBLEMS WITH BAD NEIGHBORS

Question: "We are experiencing many problems concerning our immediate neighbors - do you see them moving in the foreseeable future, as we really need to move on from an extremely traumatic couple of months?"

Psychic Advice:
Problems with bad neighbors can escalate very quickly. For some people, this can become almost like a game of one-upmanship, which is ultimately a power struggle. Issues with neighbors often have to do with issues of control and power, with one seeking to dominate others.

There are many reasons for neighbors to behave and react badly, sometimes with little or no provocation. Most people are selfish and self-centered, wanting everything their own way and seeing things only from their own point of view. 

Nowadays, more and more people are living in their own world, oblivious to the feelings of others. We have lost our sense of community and many of our social graces. The media promotes fear and mistrust of everyone around us, encouraging us to monitor one another and report any "suspicious behavior". All of this creates more and more of a sense of separation and isolation until there are great chasms between us.

We must learn to build bridges across these chasms in order to create peace, but sometimes this can be challenging to do directly, so we must learn to work on the spiritual level. Many religious doctrines ask us to "Love thy neighbor as thyself", which can be extremely difficult to do with some people. The golden rule of "Do unto others as you would have done unto you" is actually about the law of karma, because what we put out into the world is what comes back to us. Therefore, if we want peace, we must embody and exude peace.

One of the ways to achieve peace is to have no resistance. Resistance increases and escalates conflict; if you present no resistance, there is nothing to push against, and there will be no satisfactory reaction as incentive to continue pushing. Having no resistance may give the other person the illusion of being victorious and having the upper hand, but it keeps you centered in your power, claiming the peace that you desire.

Conflicts are all about power. Whenever you react or respond to someone's provocation, you give them some of your power. The more they get a rise out of you, the more power you give them, which only encourages them to continue provoking your reactions and thereby stealing power from you. This will increase their sense of power, dominance and victory, while diminishing your power and making you feel powerless.

Some people seek to vent their anger by doing malicious and unkind things to people that they don't care about. This becomes a way for them to release pent up frustration from their own lives, so they seek out targets anywhere they can (this is the cause of road rage).

Only in a personal psychic reading could I see the actual probability of your neighbors moving, but I can tell you how to end problems with bad neighbors. In order to resolve any conflict or negotiation, you must try to see things from the other person's perspective and point of view. Try to understand the type of person you are dealing with and what is motivating and driving them. What outcome do they want, and is there any way you can co-create that without compromising too much?

Sometimes a kind word and gesture can wipe the slate clean. You might want to make some form of peace offering, such as a cake, with a note of wanting to work things out so you can both cohabitate peacefully. It can be helpful to ask for what you want, and ask your neighbors what they want as an outcome.

Go into your heart to determine what feels right to you. Some people are simply jerks, and sometimes a kind gesture can throw fuel on the fire and make them feel like they are getting exactly what they want by manipulating you with their anger and bad behavior.

With some bad neighbors, good fences are the only way to have good neighbors. If you cannot build actual fences, you can create psychic boundaries by envisioning a wall of light between you that protects your property and keeps your neighbors' energy contained to their own property. Visualize a dome of light over your property that fills your space with love, light, joy and peace. Also visualize a dome of light around your neighbors' property that fills them with love, light, joy and peace as well.

You give your energy and power to whatever you focus on, which energizes and empowers that reality, and attracts more of that energy and experience to you. It is best not to focus on "willing" your neighbors to move, but rather focus on the peaceful outcome that you would like to experience. The more you focus on anger, frustration, pain, fear and resentment, the more you feed the problem. Send thoughts of peace and "love thy neighbor",

We all have neighbors, and the key is to try not to upset or offend anyone in the first place. Being as kind and friendly as possible is always the best approach because you may have to live together for a long time. Do not allow yourself to be abused though - sometimes you may have to follow a legal route in order to solve problems with bad neighbors, but let that be your last resort unless you have been given reason to have fear.

Ultimately, everyone comes into our life to give us gifts and lessons. Sometimes, a bad relationship with a neighbor is a sign from the Universe that it is time for a change or a move. We cannot change other people, so look within you to see what is in your power to change, what you must accept, and how to best create the ultimate outcome that you desire.



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